Wishing I was Poor

Economics, economics, economics.. have been on my mind. What life would be like if we were poor. I mean really poor poor. Would people matter more? Would possessions seem entirely petty? The scriptures paint a vivid picture of this idea.

So, I was running the other day, yes I have picked up running a little, at least until my knee kaputts. I am training for my big whopping 4-5 mile leg of the "Beach to Bay" marathon in May with 5 of my other superstar friends, all of which can run a 1/2 marathon with ease. Anyway... that is besides the point. So there I was, 1/2 mile into my run wondering if any of my neighbors could tell I was not a "runner". I pretended sufficiently, I think to run in a  straight line. As I concentrated on my form but not too intensely as to bring attention to myself, I saw in the blurry distance our sweet missionaries Elder Coffey and Elder Workman, 2 exceptional missionaries, doing a lot of good for a lot of people.  They were out tracking the neighborhood, I saw them ditch their bikes then make their confident approach to the door of an unsuspecting stranger about to be offered the moat incredible gift. As I proceeded my jog down the road I wondered if I should yell "hey missionaries!" or stop and wait to say hi but too many worries worried me about that so I kept on running. While out of the corner of my eye I was watching their body language, a posture of humble rejection as they shook the hand of this stranger man and bid farewell. At which point I ran faster towards the end of the street to avoid having to ask them about their brief encounter. 

As I ran the remainder of my course I was in a trance.... I quickly shifted my playlist to MOTAB and pondered about the Book of Mormon and all that is taught about how easy it is to forget our God in times of ease. We live in an area where you could suppose there is a great deal of ease relative to the general population, this section of our neighborhood particularly so. Now we are not rich by ANY stretch of the imagination but we are comfortable and sometimes I wonder if we are too comfortable.  I have wondered, had I not had the gospel in my life from the time I was born, would I have listened to those sharp, intelligent, clean cut young men with smiles on their faces and light in their eyes? Would I be able to see it if I were rich and unteachable by anything other than money and material things. Would I be like that stranger man and shut the door before the offering of the plan of happiness had even been made.....? 

I will never think of my running shoes the same. When I put those ladies on my feet, I can not help but remember the thoughts that poured through my spirit that day when on my run,  feelings of wishing we were poor. If we were poor, people would become more important than the things money can buy. Relationships are paramount over things always but I think the less you have of the material things, perspective naturally changes with the help of humility and needing more than just yourself.  We all agree that being poor economically is not usually a desired blessing. The Savior said "Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." (Matt. 5:3.) If I am never poor then, I can pray I will always be humble, teachable and poor in spirit. Humility in this case refers to subjecting oneself to the Lord in all things. That is the kind of poor I always want to be. That stranger man who lives down the street in that big fancy house may really be the poor one. If he only knew and understood how "rich" in blessings the gospel of Jesus Christ truly is. 

I know these things to be true! In the name of Jesus Christ

Amen

Nourish Your Faith

I just love it when I open up my scriptures and read a passage that virtually strums the strings of my spirit, making music within me that communicates something completely tangible but inaudible. These verses in Alma 31 - 33 created some rather spectacular music within me last night.

Alma was sure a remarkable person and I am anxious to meet him one day. He was talking about the Zoramintes and their made up religion. They would bow down to dumb idols and worship in meaningless ways and only in certain places, at certain times. Alma and the sons of Mosiah all scattered about the land to be missionaries. 1st of all, how scary is that? Going in uncharted territory, alone, to people who will kill him at a moments notice let alone bear testimony to these people that hate you. WOW, I am not sure I'd be so strong. The Zorimites remind me a lot of what is happening to religion in the world today as it says in

" Alma 31: 23 they would return home, never speaking of their God again until thy had assembled themselves together again to the holy stand, to offer up thanks after their manner."

They were boastful, prideful people, they would "cry unto thee with their mouths". They were not swallowed up in righteousness, religion/worship was a formula, a duty to perform to inherit good personal tidings but there was clearly no reward for such shallow endeavors. Alma knew their "souls are precious (Alma 31:35)".  It makes me wonder if I would fight so hard for my enemies? (think) AM I that humble as to put aside my differences to allow the voice of Christs gospel speak louder than MY words? Again very inspiring and also very revealing of my own weaknesses.

In chapter 32 he talks about a group of humble people who had been kicked out of the places of worship because they were poor. Though that had labored much to build the synagogues, still because of their exceeding poverty were cast out. Alma was filled with joy

"(Alma 32:6) for he beheld that their afflictions had truly humbled them and they were in a preparation to hear the word "

Which makes me ask how qualified are we to be humble? Alma teaches them that they do not have to be in their synagogues only to worship God. He also teaches them that they can worship more than once a week. Alma explains that because they were

"(vs.13) compelled to be humble blessed are ye, for a man sometimes, if he is compelled to be humble , seeketh repentance and now surely , whosoever repenteth shall find mercy and endureth to the end the same shall be saved."

He then posses a question in

"(vs. 14) do ye not suppose that they are more blessed who truly humble themselves BECAUSE of the word?... (vs. 16) blessed are they who humble themselves without being compelled to be humble or rather in other words blessed is he that believeth in the words of God and is baptized without stubbornness of heart, yea without being brought to know the word, or even compelled to know before they will believe....(vs. 18) for if a man knoweth a thing he hath no cause to believe, for he knoweth it... (vs.19) how much more cursed is he that knoweth the will of God and doeth it not?"

Alma explains (vs. 21) that faith is not having a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if ye have faith, ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true.

He then encourages them to experiment on their faith. Haven't we all had to do that at one time or another? DO we choose whats right without having to be COMPELLED? There in lies the real blessings. He uses the analogy of the (see vs. 28) good seed/word will enlarge the soul and enlighten your understanding and will be delicious to me! AHHH I love that, this gospel is so delicious to me! That is the perfect word, Alma and I would have been friends for sure! Then he says that good seed/word will sprouteth and beginneth to grow. DO we recognize when that happens? Do we savor that and nourish it? BUT the test comes when we will not be given all the answers and our faith does not give us a perfect knowledge... will we continue to move forward in faith? He tells us to " (vs.40) nourish the word looking forward with an eye of faith" and if we nourish it it will continue to grow with GREAT diligence, faith and patience until it will take root in you and AFTER your diligence, patience and long suffering your tree will bring forth fruit and you will reap the rewards of your faith and you will hungry and thirst no more. I think I have an idea what this great prophet was talking about about, this gospel IS SO satisfying.

The next chapter (33) is great, I love vs. 7 where he talks about going into your closet to pray...how relevant that is in my life is really funny... and sad. Alma prayed for his enemies... wow! He closes in verse 23 (this is my FAVORITE) and desires the people

"to plant this word in your hearts and as it beginneth to swell even so nourish it by your faith. And behold it will become a tree, springing up in you unto everlasting life. And then may God grant unto you that your burdens may delight, through the joy of HIs Son. And EVEN ALL THIS YE CAN DO IF YE WILL!"Amen."

That is where everything came together and the crescendo happened! "And EVEN ALL THIS YE CAN DO IF YE WILL!" It is truly a choice. We choose everyday if we will nourish it. Like my little herbs, if I am lazy and fail to give them water they begin to wither and so will our spirits. That means CHOOSING to push back the world at every opportunity because like C.S. Lewis (Mere Christianity) says when "All your wishes and hopes for the day rush at you like wild animals, the first job each morning consists simply in shoving them all back; in listening to that other voice, taking that other point of view, letting that other larger, stronger, quieter life come flowing in." = nourishing the gosple. I am certain the adversary is amongst those wild animals, the most subtle, the most covert but there nonetheless and without doubt THE most powerful BUT not as powerful as me!

I love this gospel! It is delicious, wonderful and my favorite!
Humbly, in the name of my Savior Jesus Christ
Amen

Good Thoughts for a New Year

Something to think about!

"While I believe that reverence is often exhibited through reverent behaviors, it is not behaviors that concern me now. I want to discuss reverence as an attitude of deepest respect and veneration toward Deity. Of course, reverent behaviors follow reverent attitudes, but it is the attitude of reverence that we need to cultivate first among our members. Reverent behaviors without reverent attitudes are empty of meaning because they are performed for the praises of men, not God."
--L. Tom Perry, "Serve God Acceptably with Reverence and Godly Fear," Ensign, Nov. 1990, 70

"I fear that many of us rush about from day to day taking for granted the holy scriptures. We scramble to honor appointments with physicians, lawyers, and businessmen. Yet we think nothing of postponing interviews with Deity, postponing scripture study. Little wonder we develop anemic souls and lose our direction in living. How much better it would be if we planned and held sacred fifteen or twenty minutes a day for reading the scriptures. Such interviews with Deity would help us recognize his voice and enable us to receive guidance in all of our affairs."
--Carlos E. Asay, "Look to God and Live," Ensign, Nov. 1978, 52

 "However much faith to obey God we now have, we will need to strengthen it continually and keep it refreshed constantly. We can do that by deciding now to be more quick to obey and more determined to endure. Learning to start early and to be steady are the keys to spiritual preparation. Procrastination and inconsistency are its mortal enemies."
--Henry B. Eyring, "Spiritual Preparedness: Start Early and Be Steady," Ensign, Nov. 2005, 38


"Tomorrow's joy or tomorrow's despair has its roots in decisions we make today. Perhaps some people think to themselves: 'I know I need to change some things in my life. Maybe later, but not now.' Those who stand at the threshold of life always waiting for the right time to change are like the man who stands at the bank of a river waiting for the water to pass so he can cross on dry land. Today is the day of decision."
--Joseph B. Wirthlin, "Three Choices," Ensign, Nov. 2003, 78

“My desire today is for all of us . . . to have more
straightforward personal experience with the Savior’s example. Sometimes we seek
heaven too obliquely, focusing on programs or history or the experience of others. Those
are important but not as important as personal experience, true discipleship, and the
strength that comes from experiencing firsthand the majesty of His touch. . . .[Christ] is saying to us, ‘Trust me, learn of me, do what I do. . . . If you will follow me, I
will lead you out of darkness.’ Elder Holland “Broken Things to Mend,” Ensign, May 2006


Happy New Year! It is my highest hope that this year will bring you (and me) the upmost peace, happiness and joy you have ever known. 

Much Love
Jen

HOW Do I Love Thee?

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"Jesus Christ, the light of the world is the only lamp by which you can successfully see the path of love and happiness... How should I love thee...? As HE does. For that way never faileth ."

Becoming Aquainted With God

I have had a loose piece of paper floating around in my quote journal for years now that said " There is no price too high to become acquainted with God" I had loosely scribbled the source on that tattered piece of paper as being from someone in the Martin Handcart company but have never been able to legitimize the source but I did find this one....

“Everyone of us came through with the absolute knowledge that God lives for we became acquainted with him in our extremities.The price we paid to become acquainted with God was a privilege to pay, and I am thankful that I was privileged to come in the Martin Handcart Company." (David O. McKay, “Pioneer Women,” Relief Society Magazine, Jan. 1948) Read more here. And here.  

Over the recent months as we have encountered different trials, I have spent a great deal of time pondering this idea. God expects us to endure to the end and to endure well.  The types of trials we are faced with during these last days are not as much physical ones as they are mental and emotional ones, experiences that will test our faith, understanding and our willingness to submit to all things. We do not have to carry all our belongings on our backs like the early pioneers did. We do not have to hunt for our food nor do we have to worry about freezing feet or broken handcarts... In some ways we have it so easy. We are not asked to sacrifice much in his name yet some many times we forget what we are doing and why we are here. It is precisely to become acquainted with Him. To become like Him.  The early pioneers who in many cases lost everything were the embodiment of faith, courage and obedience. I have to pause and ask myself in the mist of our trials if I bestow those same attributes....???

SO to sum this up what this quote means to me is that I can not complain when the going gets tough, I can not get frustrated, nor can I really ask for it to end because by doing so I am essentially telling the Lord the price is too high.  And I could not feel more passionately the opposite, there truly is NO price too high to become acquainted with God.

"Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ prepares you for whatever life brings. This kind of faith prepares you to deal with life’s opportunities—to take advantage of those that are received and to persist through the disappointments of those that are lost." Dallin H. Oaks "Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ"

"Enduring to the end, or remaining faithful to the laws and ordinances of the gospel of Jesus Christ throughout our life, is a fundamental requirement for salvation in the kingdom of God. This belief distinguishes Latter-day Saints from many other Christian denominations that teach that salvation is given to all who simply believe and confess that Jesus is the Christ. The Lord clearly declared, 'If you keep my commandments and endure to the end you shall have eternal life, which gift is the greatest of all the gifts of God' (D&C 14:7). "Therefore, enduring to the end is not just a matter of passively tolerating life's difficult circumstances or 'hanging in there.' Ours is an active religion, helping God's children along the strait and narrow path to develop their full potential during this life and return to Him one day. Viewed from this perspective, enduring to the end is exalting and glorious, not grim and gloomy. This is a joyful religion, one of hope, strength, and deliverance. 'Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy' (2 Nephi 2:25). "Enduring to the end is a process filling every minute of our life, every hour, every day, from sunrise to sunrise. It is accomplished through personal discipline following the commandments of God."

Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "Have We Not Reason to Rejoice?" Ensign, Nov. 2007, 20

Carry on, Carry on.
In the name of Jesus Christ
Amen

Fire in my Bones

"As we share our testimony with others, I hope that we will have the same convincing power and enthusiasm the members had who brought the message to Brigham Young. He said:

" 'The brethren who came to preach the Gospel to me, I could easily out-talk them . . .; but their testimony was like fire in my bones; I understood the spirit of their preaching; I received that spirit; it was light, intelligence, power, and truth, and it bore witness to my spirit, and that was enough for me' (Remarks by Brigham Young, 28 July 1861; JD 9:141)."

  PresidentDieter F. Uchtdorf, "Truth Restored," BYU Devotional, August 22, 2006

I love it... I love his descriptive words.  I feel fire in my bones too. I do I do!  

Lifting Burdens

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Voice of Warning

It is no mystery that I am a deep thinker. I think all the time (cause of my insomnia) and usually about big ideas and thoughts, the kind that have the capacity to exhaust you. Some nights I feel literally "rung out" emotionally and spiritually because of all the conversations I have with myself throughout the day. I have been having one particular conversation with myself for many years now about a certain topic that weighs heavily on me. It is almost impossible to verbalize or articulate my thoughts here, but I will try.

The other day I was having a "meaty" conversation with a dear friend and it got me pondering. I often use the term "I worry" when I think about the future and my children, that term I tend to use freely but it is not an accurate description of what I am really feeling.  Worry implies negative even perhaps out of control feelings which are not of God. What I feel is peaceful and concerned. I ran across a book from Parley P. Pratt called "Voice of Warning" and though fascinating, it got me thinking .. again... I realized that is the emotion I am feeling as best as I can describe it.

I was reading an amazing talk the other day by Elder James E. Faust who sticks out in my my mind as being an expert on the adversary. He has given many exceptional addresses on the topic of Satan and his enticements, ploys and devices. He is articulate and exact. When I have heard him speak in the past or read his writings I have an overwhelming feeling of confirmation that what he is saying is true. I am such a believer of what he says in this regard. That brings me back to my initial thought about "worry".. I think what I am really feeling is "warning" a rather intense feeling of warning. I am not worried because I am faithful, I am not really concerned because I have the truth and as I continue to learn the things of this gospel that keep me safe and happy, I will continue to teach and testify of truth. With that comes the urge and desire to be a voice of adamant warning to my children. Which I suppose is my motivation, I have an earnest prayer in my heart that they will understand through the help of the spirit what we are trying to teach them and that one day they will be able to govern themselves through the influence of the Holy Spirit and thwart off any attempts Satan may employ to "get them".

I will quote a few passages from President Faust Talk "Forces That Will Save Us"

"I think we will witness increasing evidence of Satan’s power as the kingdom of God grows stronger. I believe Satan’s ever-expanding efforts are some proof of the truthfulness of this work. In the future the opposition will be both more subtle and more open. It will be masked in greater sophistication and cunning, but it will also be more blatant. We will need greater spirituality to perceive all of the forms of evil and greater strength to resist it. But the disappointments and setbacks to the work of God will be temporary, for the work will go forward... It is not good practice to become intrigued by Satan and his mysteries. No good can come from getting close to evil. Like playing with fire, it is too easy to get burned: “The knowledge of sin tempteth to its commission." The only safe course is to keep well distanced from him and any of his wicked activities or nefarious practices... However, President Brigham Young (1801–77) said that it is important to “study … evil, and its consequences.” Since Satan is the author of all the evil in the world, it is essential therefore to realize that he is the influence behind the opposition to the work of God. Alma stated the issue succinctly: “Whatsoever is good cometh from God, and whatsoever is evil cometh from the devil.” ... My principal reason for choosing this subject is to help young people by warning them, as Paul said, “lest Satan should get an advantage of us: for we are not ignorant of his devices.” We hope that young people, unfamiliar with the sophistries of the world, can keep themselves free of Satan’s enticements and deceitful ways...Nephi has given to us the pattern or formula by which Satan operates “And others will he pacify, and lull them away into carnal security, that they will say: All is well in Zion; yea, Zion prospereth, all is well—and thus the devil cheateth their souls, and leadeth them away carefully down to hell. “And behold, others he flattereth away, and telleth them there is no hell; and he saith unto them: I am no devil, for there is none—and thus he whispereth in their ears, until he grasps them with his awful chains, from whence there is no deliverance.”9"

The First Presidency described Satan: “He is working under such perfect disguise that many do not recognize either him or his methods. There is no crime he would not commit, no debauchery he would not set up, no plague he would not send, no heart he would not break, no life he would not take, no soul he would not destroy. He comes as a thief in the night; he is a wolf in sheep’s clothing.”10 Satan is the world’s master in the use of flattery, and he knows the great power of speech, a power his servants often employ. (Jacob 7:4)He has always been one of the great forces of the world. "

In the book of 2 Nephi we are told, “For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things.”(2 Nephi 2:11.)Indeed, Peter warns, “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.” (1 Peter 5:8)
 
C. S. Lewis, a Christian author, gave us a keen insight into devilish tactics. In a fictional letter, the master devil, Screwtape, instructs the apprentice devil Wormwood, who is in training to become a more experienced devil: “You will say that these are very small sins; and doubtless, like all young tempters, you are anxious to be able to report spectacular wickedness. … It does not matter how small the sins are, provided that their cumulative effect is to edge the man away from the Light and out into the Nothing. … Indeed, the safest road to Hell is the gradual one—the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts." ( The Screwtape Letters pg 56)
 
C. S. Lewis also wrote: “A silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means. This is an obvious lie. Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is. … You find out the strength of a wind by trying to walk against it, not by lying down." (Mere Christianity pg 124)

I have such strong feelings about all this but I have so much faith that all whose eyes are single to the glory of God, for it is promised that their bodies will be “filled with light, and there shall be no darkness” in them.(see D&C 88:67)

Elder Faust conculdes by saying "There are forces that will save us from the ever-increasing lying, disorder, violence, chaos, destruction, misery, and deceit that are upon the earth. Those saving forces are the everlasting principles, covenants, and ordinances of the eternal gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. These same principles, covenants, and ordinances are coupled with the rights and powers of the priesthood of Almighty God. We of this Church are the possessors and custodians of these commanding powers that can and do roll back much of the power of Satan on the earth."

So once again back to the strong voice of warning I feel. I know that my Heavenly Father sent ME here to do something with these strong feelings I have . The least I can do is to teach our children the things that are important to me and know to be true. To encourage them to listen the counsel of the living Prophet who is here to guide us in these last days acting as a mouth piece for our Heavenly father, a literal "voice of warning" from heaven. I know that I have had certain experiences in this life that have benefited me and have cause to create some of these strong feelings I have.  I tend to think that it is not accidental, I am certain that I am to do something with that spiritual energy that I have boiling up inside of me, the obvious answer in the least,  is to teach my children the things that will keep them safe and happy.

I am so grateful I have the knowledge of this gospel. I am prayerful all the time that I will be able to use my deep thinking and passionate feelings towards these gospel truths for good and that I will be able to persuade my children in small ways to follow the example of our Savior and as we all are learning and growing to be like him, we can experience peace, happiness and joy in this life regardless the trials that we will face or what is happening around us.

These things I know are true. I have wildly passionate feelings about their truths.
In the name of my Savior Jesus Christ
Amen

Religious Freedom

 Apostle Says Religious Freedom Is Being Threatened Read this... 

In an address given October 13th by Elder Dallin H. Oaks

Elder Oaks said members of the Church should not be deterred or coerced into silence by threats. “We must insist on our constitutional right and duty to exercise our religion, to vote our consciences on public issues, and to participate in elections and debates in the public square and the halls of justice.”

Elder Oaks also said religious freedom is being jeopardized by claims of newly alleged human rights. As an example, he referred to a set of principles published by an international human rights group which calls for governments to assure that all persons have the right to practice their religious beliefs regardless of sexual orientation or identity. Elder Oaks said, “This apparently proposes that governments require church practices to ignore gender differences. Any such effort to have governments invade religion to override religious doctrines should be resisted by all believers.

 

“Religious values and political realities are so interlinked in the origin and perpetuation of this nation that we cannot lose the influence of Christianity in the public square without seriously jeopardizing our freedoms,” Elder Oaks concluded. “I maintain that this is a political fact, well qualified for argument in the public square by religious people whose freedom to believe and act must always be protected by what is properly called our ‘First Freedom,’ the free exercise of religion.” ”

I have felt this coming for a long time now. You have GOT to know who you are, WHAT YOU BELIEVE... WHY YOU BELIEVE IT and HOW YOU ARE GOING TO DEFEND IT!

Choose This Day

Oh I love this. Just this morning I saw the episode of Stephanie Nielson (Nie Nie) on Oprah and by the nature of her very tring experiences got me thinking about me and my life. I have things so easy. Then moments later I saw this video called "Choose This Day" Oh MY! I think the Lord is tryng to tell me something! I  just had to share it.  (PAUSE MUSIC PLAYER)

"In the hardest trials as long as you have the power to pray, you can ask a loving God. Please let me serve this day, it does not matter to me how few things I may be able to do just let me know what I CAN do. I will obey this day. I know I can with thy help." President Henry B. Eyring

just let me know what I can do.. and I will do!

General Conference Thoughts

I have had a thought blowing around in my mind for a long time now. I think and feel it with great conviction. This is IT!

You have to know WHO you are!
You have to know what you believe!
You have to know why you believe it!
and
You have to know how you are going to defend it!

That is in essence what this past General Conference told me. It was completely inspirational.

These are a few of the inspirations that came to me.

* KNOW good and DO good
* Knowing right is not enough... you must DO right
* TESTIFY of Jesus Christ!
* Listen, watch and record promptings of the Holy Ghost
* Never stop testifying!
* Do the simple things!
* Don't be casual about prayer
* Do not yield to strong emotions of the natural man...(stress, frustration, anxiety etc) they can overpower the delicate promptings of the spirit.
* concerned parents will teach valuable lessons
* Loved the "no empty chairs" thought from President Erying Sundays am session!
* Loved the "Safety equipment - you choose to use it" idea used by Sister Monson-Dibb
* "Successful travelers (us mortals in this life's journey) resist all distractions (the adversary wants to get you... think... good better or best)" (Elder Holland)
* "easiness and willingness to believe in God will come from repentance and obedience"(Elder Ringwood)

In response to Elder Holland POWERFUL talk (PLEASE listen here) Ahhh A-M-A-Z-I-N-G... it was SOOOOOO good. I am completely edified. I have thought a great deal about his talk and thought about who his audiences was... it is not those out there in the world offending with an intent to destroy this gospel, rather it is the members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints! What I heard him saying is GET up, defend this gospel with all you are, with all your might mind and strength. What more powerful way to ignite ones testimony to the remembrance of the truthfulness of this gospel, than to hear one bear passionate testimony of it (Holland). I am sure there are millions out there more fired up about what they believe because of his powerful testimony and willing to stand up and fight for it.

The lasts days will be filled with all manner of deceiving, confusion, darkness, slippery persuasiveness. We increasingly live in a world where there are little morals a "do what fells good" society, answer to no one mentality and if people do not KNOW WHO THEY ARE, WHAT they believe, WHY they believe it and HOW to defend it then we will be swayed, manipulated and deceived by the adversary or those who have been clouded with his misleading illusions. There will be and already are people out there in the world that are HIGHLY educated and philosophical that will spin words, facts and principles in a cunning, convincing yet subtle way and those who are not FULLY converted and governed with the spirit will be sadly influenced by their (and the adversary) devices. He (the adversary) would love nothing more than to confuse the minds of the righteous and committed, ah what fun he would have. Ah, NO WAY, NOT ME! Get thee behind me Satan! NEVER!

Many principles and precepts weather it will be the Book of Mormon, gay marriage or any other element of truth that has been revealed in this dispensation will eventually be charged and disputed if not already... how are you going to fight for what you believe. Do you know with certainty what you believe?

I have had several experiences (as some of you are already aware) the last few years with a few people very dear to me that have little or no understanding/belief of a Heavenly Father or a Savior. As I have gone deeper into getting to know them, I have observed their arguments to be very smart, they have studied it out, they know with exactness to the best of their secular knowledge what they believe, or should I say what they DO not believe. It scares me.... because if I had any less of a testimony than I do have now, I could possibly be influenced by them.

Elder Holland says "the Savior warned in the last days even those in the covenant, the very elect could be deceived by the enemy of truth...who so treasureth up my word shall not be deceived and in the last days neither your heart nor your faith will fail you"

In short, their is ZERO question in my mind as to the truthfulness of this gospel. Do I know everything? no. Do I understand everything? absolutely not... I do need to? no, I have unwavering faith. I have overwhelming faith and an abundance of confidence in the things I absolutely know are true and trust that one day I will have all the answers. It would be impossible for me to deny it. I am increasingly prayerful I will be able to teach our children to fight! fight! fight! for what we believe and know to be true, no matter how rule-less the world gets. To never compromise their convictions to popular belief, to not be afraid or discouraged by those of the world that have no knowledge of the things I speak of. They are scary people to me, good people? yes, I am sure many are but they do not see the colors I can see. How do you describe color to one who has never seen it?. They have not tasted the sweetness I have tasted therefore they can know nothing about what I speak about. What I testify of can not be proven, it can not be seen or heard... it is felt. It is true, it is living. There is NO doubt! I love this gospel and I will for fight it and I will stand for what I believe.

I trust what Elder Holland says and believe it wholeheartedly that "The Book of Mormon was given to bring happiness and hope to the faithful in the travail in the last days." I have felt it and KNOW it to be true.

BIG THOUGHTS.

This I know to be true, forever! In the name of Jesus Christ
Amen

Infinite Power of Hope

With the next General Conference coming up this week it has me reflecting on the past conference and all that I loved about it. I am now peaking with curiosity about all that will be said this next week and looking forward to the many ways I will be inspired, uplifted and edified.

This is one of my all time favorite talks from General Conference one year ago.

"What kind of existence can we hope for? Those who come unto Christ, repent of their sins, and live in faith will reside forever in peace. Think of the worth of this eternal gift. Surrounded by those we love, we will know the meaning of ultimate joy as we progress in knowledge and in happiness. No matter how bleak the chapter of our lives may look today, because of the life and sacrifice of Jesus Christ, we may hope and be assured that the ending of the book of our lives will exceed our grandest expectations. 'Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him' (1 Corinthians 2:9)."

..."Hope is not knowledge, but rather the abiding trust that the Lord will fulfill His promise to us....The things we hope in sustain us during our daily walk. They uphold us through trials, temptations, and sorrow. Everyone has experienced discouragement and difficulty. Indeed, there are times when the darkness may seem unbearable. It is in these times that the divine principles of the restored gospel we hope in can uphold us and carry us until, once again, we walk in the light.

..."We hope in Jesus the Christ, in the goodness of God, in the manifestations of the Holy Spirit, in the knowledge that prayers are heard and answered. Because God has been faithful and kept His promises in the past, we can hope with confidence that God will keep His promises to us in the present and in the future. In times of distress, we can hold tightly to the hope that things will 'work together for [our] good' (D&C 90:24) as we follow the counsel of God's prophets. This type of hope in God, His goodness, and His power refreshes us with courage during difficult challenges and gives strength to those who feel threatened by enclosing walls of fear, doubt, and despair." Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "The Infinite Power of Hope", Ensign, Nov. 2008, 22

Check more out here.

"This hope and optimism comes because we know, with absolute certainty, that God is in His heaven and He is the Lord Omnipotent. God's wisdom and knowledge and power are greater than all the combined forces of evil. He is able to work His will, and His purposes cannot be frustrated (see D&C 3:1). He has not left you and me to make our way alone in these perilous times. He is watching over His people."M. Russell Ballard, "Be Strong in the Lord, and in the Power of His Might" (CES fireside for young adults, March 3, 2002), 1–2

It Is Easy to Let Prayer Slip

M. Russell Ballard said this.... and loved it!

"In the hectic, pressure-filled schedules you face, I . . . know how easy it is to let prayer slip. Some of you hit the snooze button on your alarm clocks, thinking you can eke out just another minute or two of sleep, then jerk awake realizing that you are going to be late for school or work. On such mornings, prayer gets pushed aside, perhaps with a feeble promise to yourself that you will do better tomorrow. Put the alarm clock where you can't reach it from bed; that will solve this problem. Sometimes you return home late at night, exhausted and eager to collapse into bed. You may go through the motions of prayer in a perfunctory and superficial manner, but that is not the kind of prayer that helps us conquer Satan.

"...There is laughter, noise, interruptions. In such circumstances it is a challenge to find a time and a place where you can be alone with your Heavenly Father. The Savior spoke of entering our closets to pray (see Matthew 6:6), suggesting the importance of privacy and quiet when we talk with God. For most of you, your closets will not allow this to happen, so you need to find a time and place where you can be alone with the Lord and pour out your heart to Him, that you might add strength and power to your spiritual lives."M. Russell Ballard, "Be Strong in the Lord, and in the Power of His Might" (CES fireside for young adults, March 3, 2002), 2–3

This was a great reminder to me. Prayer is so essential and I DO have a strong testimony of this but did I ever need that reminder. I have to admit, I have let prayer slip a bit. It isn't that I am not praying... I am and all the time, we have family prayer religiously but my personal prayers have been compromised. Most days I feel I am praying all day long but with the 1st round of kids getting out the door at 6:55am that snooze button is ever so tempting. I have noticed as a result of my indiscipline, my thoughtful, meaningful and sincere prayer gets hurried by the sounds of cereal boxes and toast popping in the kitchen... no more. Thank you Elder Ballard for this reminder. There ARE more important things at hand.

Trials... the challenge to overcome

Right now, life is busy, so many things to juggle, nothing insurmountable but there are lots of challenges right now, some in my control, others not so much. I am trying to learn from the challenges I am faced with and grow where needed. Learning to rise above them so as to not let them completely absorb my life. When I am preoccupied with the worldly challenges I can literally feel the adversary seek his way in to my life and I am not as faithful as I really am and I am not enduring well like I know I am capable. The real challenge is to be the best person you can be in any environment and under any stress. That is hard! When I am under stress even the tension in my forehead changes, as hard as I may be trying to rise above the environment sometimes it is just plain hard.

One of my all time favorite books is "Finding Peace Happiness and Joy" by Richard G. Scott. LOVE IT! At this time I am looking for some inner peace, I think it might be a good time for a re-read.

He says "Faith, prayer, love and humility hold no great significance and produce no miracles until they become a living part of us through our own experience, aided by the sweet promptings of the Holy Spirit. In early life I found that I could learn gospel teachings intellectually and thought the power of reason and analysis, recognize that they were of significant value. But their enormous power and ability to stretch me beyond the limits of my imagination and capacity did not become reality until patient, consistent practice allowed the Holy Spirit to distill and expand their meaning in my heart. I found that while I was sincerely serving others, God forged my personal character. He engendered a growing capacity to recognize the direction of the spirit. The genius of the gospel plan is that by doing those things the Lord counsels us to do, we are given every understanding and every capacity necessary to provide peace and rich fulfillment in this life." Page 189 Chapter 16

Elder orson F. Whitney wrote "No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God, . . . and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire" (quoted in Improvement Era, Mar. 1966, 211).

I have always been one who is super grateful for the trial that come into my life for the lessons that are learned. Hard times come to us all but as I sit in the midst of the present situation I am reminded of a great scripture that brings be peace and strengthens my faith. "Be patient in afflictions, for thou shalt have many; but endure them, for lo, I am with then even unto the end of thy days." D&C 24:8

This I know for sure, giving up is not an option. Being steadfast and faithful will carry me through this life's challenges. I need to be reminded of that everyday. I KNOW He is with me forever, cheering me on and helping me more ways then I am able to recognize.

In the name of Jesus Christ
Amen

Temples

I have an enormous testimony of the temple. This is one of the best writings I have found on the blessings of the temple.

Temple statement for Utah South Area - Given in the Manti Temple April 1987 by Vaughn J. Featherstone

"The season of the world before us will be like no other in the history of mankind. Satan has unleashed every evil, every scheme, every blatant, vile perversion ever known to man in any generation. Just as this is the dispensation of the fullness of times, so it is also the dispensation of the fullness of evil. We and our wives and husbands, our children, and our members must find safety. There is no safety in the world, wealth cannot provide it, enforcement agencies cannot assure it, membership in this Church alone cannot bring it.

As the evil night darkens upon this generation, we must come to the temple for light and safety. In our temples we find quiet, sacred havens where the storm cannot penetrate to us. There are hosts of unseen sentinels watching over us and guarding our Temples. Angels attend every door. As it was in the days of Elisha so it will be for us: 'Those that be with us are more than they that be against us.' Before the Savior comes the world will darken. There will come a period of time where even the elect will lose hope if they do not come to the temples. The world will be so filled with evil that the righteous will only feel secure within these walls. The Saints will come here not only to do vicarious work, but to find a haven of peace. They will long to bring their children here for safety sake.

I believe we may well have living on the earth now or very soon, the boy or babe who will be the prophet of the Church when the Savior comes. Those who will sit in the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles are here. There are many in our homes and communities who will have apostolic callings. We must keep them clean, sweet, and pure in an oh-so-wicked world. There will be greater hosts of unseen beings in the temple. Prophets of old as well as those in this dispensation will visit the temples. Those who attend will feel their strength and their companionship. We will not be alone in our temples.

Our garments worn as instructed will clothe us in a manner as protective as temple walls. The covenants and ordinances will fill us with faith as living fire. In a day of desolating sickness, scorched earth, barren waste, sickening plagues, disease, destruction and death, we as a people will rest in the shade of trees, we will drink from the cooling fountains. We will abide in places of refuge from the storm, we will mount up as on eagles wings, we will be lifted out of an insane and evil world. We will be as fair as the sun and as clear as the moon.

The Savior will come and will honor His people. Those who are spared and prepared will be a temple loving people. They will know him. They will cry out, 'blessed be the name of He that cometh in the name of the Lord. Thou art my God and I will bless thee, Thou art my God and I will exalt thee.'

Our children will bow down at his feet and worship Him as the Lord of Lords, the King of Kings. They will bathe His feet with their tears and He will weep and bless them for having suffered through the greatest trials ever known to man. His bowels will be filled with compassion and His heart will swell as wide as eternity and He will love them. He will bring peace that will last a thousand years and they will receive their reward to dwell with Him.

Let us prepare them with the faith to surmount every trial and every condition. We will do it in these holy, sacred temples. Come, come, come up to the temples of the Lord and abide in His presence."



Temple statement for Utah South Area given in the Manti Temple in April 1987 by President Vaughn J. Featherstone. He promised if members of the Church would spend half a day in the Temple each month the following blessings would result:

1. A man would become mighty, and a woman powerful.
2. It would serve as great "insurance protection" for your marriage.
3. The blessings of the eternal God will be called down upon you, and great spiritual growth will be yours.
4. Unseen angels will watch over your loved ones when Satanic forces tempt them.
5. Your families will draw close to the Lord and there will be no empty chairs in the Celestial Kingdom.
6. Your children will go on missions.
7. Your children will get married in the temple.
8. The veil will be thin, you will have spiritual growth, and many spiritual experiences will distill upon you.
9. You will be prepared for exaltation-with a celestial body, a celestial mind and a celestial personality.
10. You will become receptive to divine guidance and receive spiritual perception to help you grapple with your problems and cares.
11. You will see clearly how to make critical decisions that weigh heavily on your mind.

We Must Be Hatched

"...The terrible thing, the almost impossible thing,
is to hand over your whole self-all your wishes and precautions-to Christ.
But it is far easier than what we are all trying to do instead. For what we
are trying to do is to remain what we call "ourselves," to keep personal
happiness as our great aim in life, and yet at the same time be "good." We
are all trying to let our mind and heart go their own way-centred on money
or pleasure or ambition-and hoping, in spite of this, to behave honestly and
chastely and humbly. And that is exactly what Christ warned us you could not do. As He said, a thistle cannot produce figs. If I am a field that contains nothing but grass-seed, I cannot produce wheat. Cutting the grass may keep it short: but I shall still produce grass and no wheat. If I want to produce wheat, the change must go deeper than the surface. I must be ploughed up and re-sown.

That is why the real problem of the Christian life comes where people
do not usually look for it. It comes the very moment you wake up each
morning. All your wishes and hopes for the day rush at you like wild
animals. And the first job each morning consists simply in shoving them all
back; in listening to that other voice, taking that other point of view,
letting that other larger, stronger, quieter life come flowing in. And so
on, all day. Standing back from all your natural fussings and frettings;
coming in out of the wind.

We can only do it for moments at first. But from those moments the new
sort of life will be spreading through our system: because now we are
letting Him work at the right part of us. It is the difference between
paint, which is merely laid on the surface, and a dye or stain which soaks
right through. He never talked vague, idealistic gas. When he said, "Be
perfect," He meant it. He meant that we must go in for the full treatment.
It is hard; but the sort of compromise we are all hankering after is
harder-in fact, it is impossible. It may be hard for an egg to turn into a
bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while
remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on
indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go
bad."

C.S. Lewis
Mere Christianity
pg154-155

My favorite part is " the very moment you wake up each
morning. All your wishes and hopes for the day rush at you like wild
animals. And the first job each morning consists simply in shoving them all
back; in listening to that other voice, taking that other point of view,
letting that other larger, stronger, quieter life come flowing in."

PUSH THEM BACK.... PUSH THEM BACK.... PUSH THEM BACK...!

I Love C.S. Lewis

Be Still...

Things got busy... FAST! I can not believe it has been so long since I posted here. Certainly not due to a lack of things to share, just an over committed life and a long list of priorities. We are on a summer hiatus in Utah right now and it has been fabulous. I have been able to reflect on the quietness of life here and the tremendous value of simple things. We have departed from the hustle and bustle of reality to a slower paced, relaxed, paradise like environment. It will be hard to snap out of it when we have to go home. Having been here my testimony has grown on the value of quite time. It is very challenging if not nearly impossible to coordinate quality quite time when we are all home coming and going but it nonetheless is essential for proper planning and prioritizing of a big family and effective listing to the promptings of the spirit. I have been flooded with little nuggets of personal revelation while here, embraced in the arms of quite. Elder Wirthlin recently said

“... We should lower the noise level in our homes so that the noise of the world will not overpower the still, small voice of the Holy Ghost….”

Our homes can and should be still too, sometimes. If it is hard to come by that probably means you need it most and should strive harder to lower the noise level for times of meaningful reflection and conversations.

Distractions... There are OH so many distractions in reality. It is easy to be thrown off track with often times inevitable distractions that are part of life, the key is knowing how to get your self back on track. Russell M. Nelson said

"Some people on life’s journey forget who they really are and what is really important. Without sure identity and priority, blessings that matter most are at the mercy of things that matter least…. Eternal principles that govern happiness apply equally to all. “Identity, Priority, and Blessings,” Ensign, Aug 2001, 6.

Isn't that the truth, when noise and distractions are present "blessings that matter most are at the mercy of things that matter least…".

I will adjourn my visit here in a couple of weeks with a new commitment to increase quite in my home, simplify and sanctify my home. It is not the things that are important it is the people. Dallin H. Oaks said

"In contrast to the institutions of the world, which teach us to know something, the gospel of Jesus Christ challenges us to become something“ The Challenge to Become,” Ensign, Nov 2000, 32–34.

I want my home to be a constant effort in becoming a "quiet" haven from the noisy world and the battle grounds of the adversary.

I have a new love for quiet and bear testimony to the importance to having a home free of noises of the world and distractions which will then be full of important, meaningful, eternal relationships. A home where "eternal principles that govern happiness" will be available to all.

“seek not the things of this world but seek ye first to build up the kingdom of God, and to establish his righteousness; and all … things shall be added unto you” (JST, Matt. 6:38; see KJV, Matt. 6:33, footnote a)

I bear testimony of these things in the name of my Savior Jesus Christ
Amen

If Ye Are Prepared...

"Even if you cannot always see that silver lining on your clouds, God can, for He is the very source of the light you seek. He does love you, and He knows your fears. He hears your prayers. He is your Heavenly Father, and surely He matches with His own the tears His children shed....Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don’t come until heaven; but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come." Jeffrey R. Holland

In light of the “pandemic panic” which is presently creeping through our nation, and the world, I think it is important to step back and put things into proper perspective. What the world needs now is healing by staying calm and coming together. That can only happen if we refuse to buy into the media rumor mongering and exploitation. We must reject panic & fear, and embrace peace with FAITH and hope.

"The great test of life is to see whether we will hearken to and obey God’s commands in the midst of the storms of life." Henry B. Eyring, “Spiritual Preparedness: Start Early and Be Steady,”

There is a great deal on my mind today. My heart is heavy, my thoughts are full. Here are a few snip its of thought that have warmed my heart in uncertain times and reaffirmed my testimony that "if ye are prepared ye shall not fear" D&C 38:30.

President Monson said "We do live in turbulent times. Often the future is unknown; therefore, it behooves us to prepare for uncertainties."

In President Gordon B. Hinckleys talk, “If Ye Are Prepared Ye Shall Not Fear,” Nov 2005 he says "We can so live that we can call upon the Lord for His protection and guidance. … We cannot expect His help if we are unwilling to keep His commandments... I am saying nothing that has not been said for a very long time."

“Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:

“But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:

“For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” Matthew 6:19–21

I feel in unison with Sister Helen Lee Goates when she said “I am at peace in my world and pray that you may be sustained in yours by firm testimonies and unwavering convictions of the gospel of Jesus Christ.”

"Decisions now to exercise faith and be steady in obedience will in time produce great faith and assurance. That is the spiritual preparedness we all will need. And it will qualify us in the moments of crisis to receive the Lord’s promise that “if ye are prepared ye shall not fear.” Henry B. Eyring

So come what may...this gospel is true and is full of peace and hope.
In the name of my Savior Jesus Christ
Amen

Come what may...

Happiness in times of trail...

Sweet as an Apple

I had an interesting and uplifting day today. We had our stake Relief Society Enrichment and Janice Kapp Perry came as our quest speaker. She is a remarkable woman and SO very talented. I am so grateful for her gifts and talents. None of our children that go through primary will ever be the same since she has written so many of the songs we parents sing to our children as they fall asleep at night. My daughters favorite song is "I Love to See the Temple", one of mine too. Though many of the songs we heard were songs I have heard a bazillion times, it was still absolutely wonderful to hear her story and to hear her sweet testimony of this great gospel. I was even brave enough to sing in the choir who sang 2 of her songs, it turned out very nice.

Though the music was inspiring and sweet it was not nearly as sweet as the darling sister that sat to my right in the choir. Her name was Corine Apple. When I came into practice I was late and not being aware of where all the parts were standing I unknowingly stood in with the Altos and I am a Soprano so I gathered my things and moved to the other side of the room and stood next to a lady I did not know. Upon moving into the chapel I took one of the few available seats on the back row and within minutes this lady came and sat on my right. She was dressed in a periwinkle colored dress, long golden brown hair with curled bangs, a smile rich with happiness and beautiful eyes that twinkled with that "something special". I introduced myself to her and began a little introductory conversion. Somewhere along the way she mentioned she hasn't been here very long and my immediate reaction was that she was like me, new to Texas. She was quick to clarify that she was a new member of the church. She shared a few of the details about her conversion and then came time for the program to begin despite my anxiousness to visit with her more we needed to be still. Throughout the program she intermittently wept and from my point of view was so tenderly touched by the spirit that tears were streaming the majority of the program. These were clearly tears of peace and joy.

I was so touched by this sweet sister, I was eager for the program to end so I could wrap my arms around her. She was literally spilling over in the spirit, I could feel it so intensely, it was nearly tangible.

At the conclusion of this wonderful program we continued our conversation and she shared a little more about her and her life. This sweet lady had a rapid fire conversion where she met with the missionaries and was instantaneously converted. She desired to be baptized immediately but was told she had to wait at least 3 weeks. She was baptized last September and is now SO anxious to get in the temple.
She commented how lucky I was to have been born and raised in the Church and how much she wished she had been because it would have saved her so much heartache, suffering and trails. Though to an extent I believe that is true but she beheld a gift that even some "born and raised|" members do not... "The spirit of God, Like a Fire is Burning". It made me think of a quote I heard recently by John Cassian, who was a Christian teacher born in A.D. 354. In a paraphrased translation from the German text is quoted

"It is easier for a worldly person to come to a healing change of his life, or even to the top of perfection, than a tired saint who is fallen from his first enthusiasm, because the worldly man will go through pain and agony and, sooner or later, he will not be able to stand it any longer, and will rush in the depths of depression to the source of true cleansing. But, when somebody has begun to pollute his name as a saint, without joyfulness and enthusiasm, he will still feel safe and, therefore, will not recognize what he is missing and, therefore, he is not easy to be taught. He will say in his heart, I'm blessed. I know it all and need nobody. [Johannes Cassian, Spannkraft der Seele (Freiburg: Herder, 1981), pp. 149­50; or see John Cassian, Collations (Conferences) 4:19]"

Sometimes it would be better being a convert because you have seen the other side. This small little interaction has made a profound impact on my life. This woman is SO special and was literally radiating the spirit, I could feel it, I could see it and I understood it. I felt it more strongly in her, this sweet convert of 7 months than I do in many "born and raised" Mormons. I understand what causes her to "spill over" because I have those feelings too. Sometimes I get that sensation that I cannot possibly hold it in, I have written of these feelings many times.

This experience stands as a testimony that each one of us has great influence. My sweet new friend embodied our family scripture for this year, "Therefore let your light so shine before this people, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven." 3 Nephi 12:16

Joseph B. Wirthlin said "Jesus wants every one of us to know him because of the transforming power of that knowledge and because of the indescribable joy it brings into our lives. But the influence of the gospel is to extend beyond each individual. It is to be as a light that dispels the darkness from the lives of those around us. No one of us is saved solely and simply for himself alone, just as no lamp is lighted merely for its own benefit." “Let Your Light So Shine,”

Oh I wish I could get to know this sweet sister more. I am not sure if I will ever see her again but I want to thank her for testifying to me the truthfulness of this gospel. Though we did exchange some words, what she testified was mainly communicated through the spirit. What a remarkably blessed daughter of God she is to be so filled with the light of Christ that she can not hold it back, what a sweet angel she is and I am grateful to have been with in her sphere of influence,even for a short time. I am anxious to see her again.... someday.

I know this gospel is true. I know the Savior lives. Humbly in Jesus Christ name
Amen

Sanctity of Marriage

I have some strong feelings about the same gender marriage issue that seems so prevalent in political arenas lately, particularly in the most recent election. To some it may seem as if the issue has gone by the wayside because it is no longer being covered on mainstream media, DON'T let that fool you! This is a sleeping dragon, that will soon rear its head again, remembering with vivid contempt the defeat of this past election and will soon be pressing down again in hopes for majority acceptance. During this seemingly peaceful slumber, a carefully crafted battle is being orchestrated that will require every American to consider what they value and why.

Not too long ago I received a note from someone very very dear to me, respectfully expressing their “wholehearted” disagreement to my position on the “prop 8” in California. For those that do not know what that is, “prop 8” was a proposition presented last election in November to protect marriage between a man and a woman in the state of California. It was a very violent debate and terrible unfair things happened to many of the members in California that were in support of that proposition. I, like many of you support that. I also support the efforts my church (LDS) is making to encourage people to take a stand and advocate for the protection of marriage. Since we live in Texas, a conservative state at large it is unlikely we will be faced with this decision on a state level for some time. This is a tender subject and apologize if my position offends, gratefully everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

I have hesitated posting this for some time but I feel it important enough and so intricately tied to my testimony to ignore. I would suspect few if any will take the time to read this lengthy post however if you do I think it will state with clarity the position I take on this issue and hopefully will inspire you to form your own firm position if you have not already. If this is an issue you have not yet had to face personally and as a result have been afforded the luxury of remaining indifferent, I firmly believe there will be a day soon, where we all will have to take a committed stand and fight for what we believe to be important. It is a broad topic with more that one answer none of which are simple and to accurately address my position and motivation, it required a great deal of focus and time in my behalf.

The below letter (in its entirety) was written in response to the note I received several months back. There was no possible way to sum up my reasoning’s for my position. My strong feeling on the issue warranted a strong answer. For my own personal reasons and for my posterity’s sake I thought it was worth recording.

“ Dear _______

I would like to apologize for my (very) tardy response. Perhaps you have lost interest in the subject and if that is the case ignore the l e n g t h y essay below. If you are still intrigued….. I will apologize in advance for the long windedness of this letter. I would only devote this kind of time and energy on a subject I feel passionately about and to one who I know really cares to hear what I have to say. It is impossible to “sum it up”. I could have opted for the short answer here but it would not have done it justice and would have been a cop out and as a result I have chosen to really, honestly lay it out. This is not an issue I take lightly, this issue is very complex and as a result warranted a rather lengthy, complex response. Our life is VERY busy and though I have wanted to reply for many weeks, I have not had the opportunity to reply with any quality, until now.

I would like to express my sincere appreciation for your candor and mutual interest in hearing my perspective. It’s funny that we have such a wonderfully diverse family in so many aspects, political orientations, economic situations, geographic locations, philosophical beliefs, and certainly in our diversity of religion and faith based beliefs, yet we don’t take the time to truly and sincerely try to understand each other’s rich pool of experiences and beliefs. Interesting that when you think about it, our extended family is simply a microcosm of our country’s social demographic of diversity. How great it is to be a part of a family of passionate thinkers, believers and doers! So it’s sad that we don’t open up our dialog more and broaden our understanding of one another’s views. I guess what I am saying is that I hope you never hesitate to ask a tough question, I have thick skin and our blood is even thicker.

I would like to preface my response by stating that I totally love you and respect you greatly. No difference in our opinion or thoughtful philosophical debate of issues would change that or my admiration for you. Hopefully we are mature enough to appreciate each other and our differences regardless how they may differ. Even if you yourself were to tell me you were involved a same gender relationship, my opposition of this movement would not change how I care for you. Please know that I have no desire to offend you or your position, having said that, with your invitation, I will gladly share my feelings pertaining to this “PROP 8” issue and hope you will respect me and my reasoning in return. Please take my response gently; knowing that I too have studied this out a great deal and for more than one reason I have justification to standing firmly in my opposition of the gay marriage issue.

Now, having said all that, I have to admit, that for us to have a truly productive and effective dialog on the merits of our different views regarding the proper definition of marriage and why it is that our church would encourage its members to take a stand, it would take much more than a response in an email and it would be unfair to both of us IF we were truly trying to understand each other’s views. If there is to be any level of productive learning of each other’s views, we would need to first establish what each of our views are, how they differ and where they may be in agreement. I will however share some fundamental beliefs that would shape the discussion.

For the record, I need to express with enthusiasm, my abiding love for all human beings. There are plenty of people out there in the world that live very different lifestyles than myself and do things I would never do. That does not change the fact that these people have beating hearts and a living spirit that deserve love and kindness above all else. I believe we are to love everyone and accept everyone, EVEN IF I morally disagree with their choices. It is not my place to judge anyone, in the end we will answer to ONE, our maker. Though it is not the case with everyone, I personally am able to disagree with ones lifestyle AND accept and love them for the human being they are, simultaneously.

I appreciate your argument about avoiding the injection of personal religion into politics. To an extent I agree with you but not whole heartedly. Clearly you have read and studied many of the websites on anti “prop 8”, the internet is suffocating with carefully articulated and rather augmentative propaganda. I have read many of their arguments as well as I have studied out the issue for myself. One of the gay/lesbian platforms is the “freedom from religion” issue you mentioned, meaning that our forefathers were seeking freedom from religion and any opposition of same gender marriage is (in my opinion, erroneously) imposing our beliefs on what a marriage is, based on our religious ideals hence “injecting” religion into politics. That tends to be exploited anytime a God fearing organization shows opposition to the same gender marriage issue. I do have strong feelings about this and would gladly argue that point (freedom from religion) another day but that is not what I wish to discuss today. In fact is there are many points of debate pertaining to this topic but for today’s purposes I will ignore many with the exception of 2 key issues, religion and lifestyle.

Before we begin this sociological conversation I must ask you a few questions, mainly pertaining to religion. There is no since proceeding with this conversation if we do not set the ground work for a basic understanding of one another. Since you have propped the door open just a smidgen to talk religion, I must gently ask you some rhetorical questions. Do you believe in God? Do you have a God? What are your beliefs? Do you know what you believe?..............Please think about that long and hard before reading my response because I think your ability to understand or appreciate my position will largely be determined on what YOU do or don’t believe. That does not mean we will agree rather you may not ever understand where I am coming from if you do not believe in God.

It is of no surprise to you that I AM a very spiritual person. Let me take a moment to bear my testimony to you. I do have a faith (gospel) that is a HUGE part of my life; in fact everything that I do, think, breath and aspire to is predicated on my beliefs. I have convictions, goals and ideals that are centered precisely around what I irrevocably believe to be true. There is intense happiness and joy in the knowledge I have found and it has been testified to me as truth many, many times. I know where I came from, I know why I am here and I also know where I am going. I am not afraid to be a spiritual person, I am not afraid to share what I believe. I, in no way feel vulnerable because I am religious and spiritual, even despite the unpopularity of religious conservatives in this day and age. It has been told many times that organized religion and God fearing people will be under scrutiny and unpopular as the world becomes more wicked, that is becoming evident now. There is nothing…. Let me repeat that, there is NOTHING that you or anyone else could ever do or say that would alienate me from my religion or what I know to be true. There is no opinion or group of passionate philosophers that could alter my determination to support my values and the gospel I unceasingly love and believe is true. I believe in God, I believe in a Savior Jesus Christ, I believe in a Holy Spirit that comforts, teaches, warns, enlightens, and inspires me…these things I know to be true!

It makes me very sad to hear that I am “increasingly your only peer in a faith based world”, that truly amazes me! Sadly, I have made similar observations of the world in general. It is bothersome to me that so many in this world are virtually floating around like a feather, blowing every which way in the wind being swayed, pulled, pushed by the winds of majority. For me, religion provides me roots when planted securely in the word of God; I can stand strong against the winds of the world. My soul and spirit are deeply nourished, which blesses every facet of my life with peace happiness and joy. With religion one finds convictions, ethics and personal boundaries in a world that would be otherwise, boundary less, conviction less and blanketed with shallow ethics where “anything goes” and “if it makes you happy, then do it” mentality. One of the great sophistries of our age, I think, is that merely because one has an inclination to do something, that therefore acting in accordance with that inclination is inevitable. That’s contrary to our very nature as the Lord has revealed to us. We do have the power to control our behavior. The fact that religion is being crucified at the crux of conservative vs. liberal debate is really provoking. “Religion” should have nothing to do with the sociological problems of today except by the nature of these current issues, it clearly defines 2 different groups’ people, one that is God fearing and one that is Godless. Let me explain…

Many would argue that those who report an unwillingness to vote for gay marriage propositions are guided by their values, their religious beliefs, a general prejudicial disposition, or a targeted homophobic disposition. I would suggest based on that assumption, this issue mostly is problematic for the religious conservatives because it does offend their fundamental religious beliefs. On the other hand new irreligious imperialism seeks to disallow certain opinions simply because those opinions grow out of religious convictions, therefore it’s supporters are overwhelmingly without God. The teaching that only male-female sexual activity within the bounds and constraints of marriage is the only acceptable form, should be reason enough for any homosexual to denounce the Christian religion. In terms of religious statistics of homosexuals it is OVERWHLEMINGLY atheist 88.31% or agnostic. That alone explains the religious demographics of the “prop 8“ advocates. Granted many of those that opposed “prop 8” and thereby were advocating a change to the definition of marriage as it has been from the beginning of time, are not in same gender relationships but they too, as you mentioned are increasingly distant from any organized religion and disinterested or indifferent about their relationship with God and as a result have little or no governing compass that is liberally given to those that have the spirit of God with them. I feel certain that one of the bigger problems of our society as we know it is people in general do not know what they believe in, so they cling on to anything or anyone that supports their ambiguous belief system. Many times just in an effort to support what ever particular lifestyle they have chosen.

So to say that we should avoid injecting religion into our politics is really a contradiction in terms because what this movement and many others in the same sociological network are doing is essentially injecting the removal of religion or God from our world, politics and out of what our forefathers founded. Regardless of your argument, our forefathers were God fearing men that had fierce faith, and strong convictions.

Over the past years there has been unrelenting pressure from advocates of that lifestyle to accept as normal, what is not normal, and to characterize those who disagree as narrow-minded, bigoted and unreasonable. Such advocates are quick to demand freedom of speech and thought for themselves, but equally quick to criticize those with a different view and, if possible, to silence them by applying labels like “homophobic”, “judgmental” “self righteous” “prejudice”, “narrow-minded” and even “un American”. I am not homophobic, as mentioned above I unconditionally love any good human being and believe everyone has the right to choose for themselves because everyone will be judged for their own acts. That is a cornerstone of my faith, it is our agency to act and choose for ourselves and that our accountability will be to one person, our Heavenly Father. So while I do believe that it is everyone’s God given right to act and choose a lifestyle as they please, I do not believe that others have the right to impose a re-definition of what has been, from the beginning of time, a deeply religious definition of what marriage is simply because they want their lifestyle choices to be judged, accepted and classified as more “mainstream”. Yes they should have the same general legal rights as long as those rights are in the best interest of society (in particular, I would not want what is best for the development of children to be sacrificed for the selfish interests of those that want to be seen as more mainstream). But yes, they should have all the legal rights that married heterosexual couples have, just don’t redefine what I, and millions of other religious believers hold dear.

One of the main reasons we hold that definition so dear, is that we believe that the very best environment for the mental, emotional, and spiritual development of a child is in a home wherein a mother and a father are deeply committed to each other and to the nurturing and development of that child. Integral to the institution of marriage are sacred covenants that are intended to ensure that a father and a mother are committed to each other so that they can be there to nurture and raise the children that will be born out of that union, and to raise those children in the best possible environment. It is certainly our belief and I believe studies have clearly proved out that the roles of a female nurturing influence and a male father influence are fundamental to the optimum development of a child. The marriage covenants are mainly for the benefit of the children! So the very essence of marriage covenants is to establish a foundation for raising emotionally healthy and productive children. Of course this is the “ideal” and we see that there are many detractions from this ideal, including the rapid increase in divorce, child abuse, abandonment, etc.. But that does not mean that society should give up on the ideal! Redefining marriage as anything but the ideal union for bringing children into this world diminishes that ideal. Once marriage covenants are no longer associated with and have no relevance to procreation, society loses the IDEAL foundation on which to raise productive citizens and healthy societies. So we must fight to keep the ideal in place and then nurture, serve, help, heal, love, and encourage all those that fall outside of the ideal (single parents, orphans, foster children, etc…). But do not redefine the ideal in the name of Gay rights!

I do absolutely believe that marriage is ordained of God and IS sacred and should only be between a man and a woman. There are other obvious anatomical reasons as to why marriage should be between man and woman. All the other arguments posed by same gender marriage advocates, though provocative are irrelevant because of my belief in God and the sanctity of marriage. Let’s not forget that for thousands of years the institution of marriage has been between a man and a woman. Until quite recently, in a limited number of countries, there has been no such thing as a marriage between persons of the same gender.

Now on to the issue of lifestyle... Many in opposition, even those without religion in their life have issues with the lifestyle and for good reason. Let’s talk statistics for a minute. The term “statistics don’t lie” is only partially true and obviously I accept that with all statistics there is a margin of error, they can for the most part paint a general picture and in this case the statistics even when assumed general, are not favorable to the homosexual community or its lifestyle. Homosexuals consist of 1-2% nationwide and 3-4% in the state of California. What makes them think they have the right to redefine the whole institution for everyone? That is presumptuous in the extreme and terribly wrong-headed, which if given to some relationship, other than marriage between a man and a woman tend to degrade if not destroy the institution that’s been honored over so many thousands of years.
The other statistics are equally alarming and disproportionate. 78% of homosexuals are affected by STDs, homosexuals account for well over 50% of the AIDS cases in the United States, which is a large number considering that they account for only 1-2% of the population. There are many other statistics that are horrifying and not even worth mentioning.

The long and short of it is; I understand people have all kinds of tendency, appetites, desires and even some predispositions and not all of them are good for you, nor are they ordained of God. Just because one has the desire or inclination to act a certain way or do a certain thing, does not mean he should. I do believe that for the greatest level of happiness, we need to live within the bounds the Lord has set. We indisputably have agency to choose for ourselves what path we will go and one day we will have to face our maker and have to answer for ourselves. Clearly I disagree with same gender orientation and same gender marriage for ethical, moral and spiritual reasons. All of which are intertwined. You will find that more people with strong convictions are generally motivated by a core of beliefs and in many cases are founded in principle, on God. It is impossible to assume the separation of religious beliefs and political motives, as one clearly motivates the other.
God loves all of His children. He has provided a plan for His children to enjoy the choicest blessings that He has to offer in eternity. Those choicest blessings are associated with marriage between a man and a woman by appropriate priesthood authority to bring together a family unit for creation and happiness in this life and in the life to come.

I know there are many good, solid, wonderful people out there in the world in healthy respectful monogamous same gender relationships that are doing great things. I do have compassion for them even thought I do not support their life style choice. Unfortunately those committed monogamous same gender relationships are also disproportionate to the homosexual community as a whole and is not an accurate representation. Even if the percentages were reversed it would not change my stance. Having said that, I do believe that those in a committed relationship should be entitled rights that protect them and insures them with privileges only available to committed, legally bound relationships. That is not in dispute. And I also recognize that those rights are as of yet not all available to same gender couples. There needs to be more done to ensure those rights, but changing the definition of marriage is not the way to achieve those rights. I think that if those organizers who are pushing hard to change the definition of marriage, were to really be honest, we would find that this really is not about gay rights, (those can be achieved by other means). Rather, because of years of shameful discrimination against gays imposed by a generally homophobic society, the gay community has had to rally together and fight against such prejudices. Their greatest desire is not so much for gay rights (although that is a close 2nd and is integrally tied in with the first) but it is first to have their lifestyle be seen as normal, to be “mainstream”. The fastest way to achieve mainstream acceptance is to have the legal system, the courts, and the highest authority, officially recognize that same sex unions are “no different from heterosexual unions”. That would be perhaps the greatest single perception change of their lifestyle that could ever be achieved. I certainly understand that tactic, but I also believe it to be a reckless and selfish means to their desired end. I’m sorry, but I believe they must find their peace by some other means. I do not believe that the sanctity of marriage and its importance to the fabric of a healthy society should be the sacrificial lamb!

It would be fair to expect there will be many would CLAIM to be Christians within the gay and lesbian community who profess to believe in God and Jesus Christ. I can not argue that. There will also be many living outside the gay and lesbian community who claim to be "Christians" and support same gender marriage. I cannot speak for their motivations but I would suspect they have no REAL idea as to what that means to be Christian or who God is. There are many who profess to be something but in act and deed are the very opposite of what they say they are. What I KNOW is that the Heavenly Father (God) I know and the Jesus Christ I know and the Holy Spirit I know, rejoices in the covenanted marriage between husband and wife, male and female.

Clearly this is a subject that has provoked frustration on both sides of the spectrum, on so many levels and is sure to continue with fervor for many years. I would suspect in time “prop 8” supporters will lose their fight but that in no way proves its correctness.

This is where I stand. This is what I believe and why. I hope all of this makes sense to you and you can now have a better appreciation for my position. It is sad there is so much opposition in the world but the scriptures have already told us that there must be “opposition in all things”!

I would like to close my comments with a quote from a past leader of our church. Whether or not you are a member of our church or not, what he says feels good in my heart. Joseph F. Smith says

"After we have done all we could do for the cause of truth, and withstood the evil that men have brought upon us, and we have been overwhelmed by their wrongs, it is still our duty to stand. We cannot give up; we must not lie down. Great causes are not won in a single generation. To stand firm in the face of overwhelming opposition, when you have done all you can, is the courage of faith. The courage of faith is the courage of progress. Men who possess that divine quality go on; they are not permitted to stand still if they would. They are not simply the creatures of their own power and wisdom; they are instrumentalities of a higher law and a divine purpose.

’Others would quit, they would avoid trouble. … they cannot see the hand of God in the affairs of men, because they see only with the eye of man and not with the eye of faith. All resistance is gone out of them—they have left God out of the question. They have not put on his whole armor. Without it they are loaded down with fear and apprehension, and they sink. To such men everything that brings trouble seems necessary. As Saints of God, it is our duty “to stand,” even when we are overwhelmed by evil.

’When a man makes up his mind to forsake the world and its follies and sins, and identify himself with God’s people, who are everywhere spoken evil of, it takes courage, manhood, independence of character, superior intelligence and a determination that is not common among men; for men shrink from that which is unpopular, from that which will not bring them praise and adulation, from that which will in any degree tarnish that which they call honor or a good name.

”Let the spirit of this gospel be so embedded in my soul that though I go through poverty, through tribulation, through persecution, or to death, let me and my house serve God and keep his laws. However, the promise is that you shall be blessed through obedience. God will honor those who honor him, and will remember those who remember him. He will uphold and sustain all those who sustain truth and are faithful to it. God help us, therefore, to be faithful to the truth, now and forever." Gospel Doctrine, 119–20, 211, 251.

In Ephesians it reads….6:10-18
“Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints"

Much Love!
Jen